Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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