what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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