Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize