dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
