you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
