I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize