And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
