Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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