I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
