hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
There are leaves in my underwear?
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