You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
