your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
