I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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