You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
