I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
