I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
