Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
