last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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