Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
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