but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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