Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize