if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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