So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
They took my balls.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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