Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
