In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize