thus making me awesome and them whores
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
