So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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