we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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