She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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