i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
