Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Randomize
