their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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