Pappa wants mamma naked
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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