New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
