hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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