I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize