so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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