I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
