Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
