wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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