Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
he thought i was a dude.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
