how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
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