C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
