I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
