Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize
