Your mouth is God's brothel.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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