11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
