next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
