You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
