Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
