my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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