Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
