i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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